Lately I’ve been speaking about the interaction between people and how important it is. I believe relationships are the most important commodity we have when it comes to life. This is an understanding I’ve gained based on my spiritual growth, which was really a direct result of me becoming tired of having the same results in my relationships.
Of course I’m led by my attraction when it comes to women, but like all things attraction has its place. As long as I allowed it to be my guide, it continued to lead me to unfulfilling relationships. Think about everything we lust in life: we have to have it because of the newness. Nothing remains new, so once that wore off I found myself looking for something new again. It’s a vicious cycle that leaves us all victimized.
We grow tired of being victims of this cycle, become determined to have something more in life, but attraction never leaves. We learn to set it aside and focus on the most important thing, and that’s our treatment of others. My quality of life changed when I started taking the time to consider others; from that consideration came true friendships.
To be able to do this, I had to put attraction aside, because this would lead me to a self-serving act. Being selfish is what really brought me my hardships in life in the first place. I refused to have that as my reality any further. Two people who are attracted to each other can be friends, but the only way this can be is if they both want the same thing. Based on the direction the relationship takes, the physical connection could serve as an added bonus.
Best friends, no matter how long their relationship lasts, never lose interest with one another. Their relationships are filled with life not lust. And yes, friendships between same-sex does start with an attraction. Remember, something drew you to that person in the first place. I love you all with all my heart.
Clayton Reid Jones