For some time, I had been feeling like I was misplaced when it came to my work. I noticed there were a lot of differences between me and my co-workers. In most jobs, if you take a close look at the people and their positions, typically you will find many similarities. People who find themselves doing the same things for a living normally have a lot in common. With me it was just the opposite. The way I thought, the way I felt, the things I was interested in, and the stance I would take on most issues, all seemed to be different from my peers. These differences eventually would penetrate me in such a way, that I began feeling like I didn’t belong.
One of the most glaring differences that set me apart from my co-workers was my race, and how much I loved celebrating my ethnicity. The funny thing is, there was another African-American among the crew, but time and time again I was left to feel like I was alone. He and I befriended each other and shared some experiences outside of work. I would often visit his home and attend parties that he gave, but as time moved on I noticed the support seemed to be one-sided. Every time I extended an invitation to something I was having, he would always decline or just not show up. It wouldn’t be long before I started recognizing the obvious; the friendship was a facade and this person was fake. All the invitations to his house and to the parties were just a ploy to bring some much desired attention to himself. His need for attention would also show itself within our work.